In a Sentimental Mood.....

Untitled

I miss her texts

Every one

No matter how brief

Copied

Or inconsequential

Every time my phone beeped

Every time my pocket vibrated

Something felt....

Warm inside me

Something felt....

Full

I miss that feeling

Most

So far....

Another Vintage Forray.....

Hey everyone. Happy President's Day Eve Eve to you all. I hope you celebrate by wearing a stove-pipe hat and freeing some of the slaves from your basement. I know I will! The offering today was written in a small (read: very small) studio apt. in Perugia, Italy. I had had a fairly rough night and was shot down by multiple women and trying to reevaluate my life's outlook. Trying, as always, to figure out what is going wrong. I am always analyzing like that. It's.....ummmm.... I don't know. I guess it's just me. Enjoy this rambling, somewhat heavy handed analysis.

A Poet's Lament


I stare at a Blank Page

No words, No meaning, No Life

And I wonder, how do I differ?

I see nothing, yet am I not also nothing?

I feel that I am shrouded

But in what I do not know

Has my life tumbled out of control?

Have I changed without my knowledge?

Perhaps.... Perhaps

I feel that my inability to communicate with humanity

Has left me with a void

Meaning is there, yet I convey none of it

Life tumbles on around me

But something seems to be missing

Have I become so inept that I've been masked?

Laughter emits from a distant source

I know not why it angers me

Where do my failings end and my life begin?

I have striven to do my best, yet who is to say this?

I feel confused, I feel alone, I feel...... off

Purpose of Life blurred

Blurred by a social concept called success

Who has made it this way?

If man is a noble being, as it has been said

Why must we suffer for simply being born into a cruel world?

My words reflect feelings, yet they are viewed by none

It seems to be no more than an empty auditorium

In which I conduct an orchestra for an audience composed of myself

Time tumbles on, what one chooses to do is inconsequential...

Or is it?

So. I think a lot of that felt fairly accurate on my current state. The success stuff semmed a bit forced. Oh well. Enjoy!

3 more hours....

Morning everyone. I am celebrating my Psuedo-Saturday by sitting around and only ingesting clear liquids. Can I get a "Yay, Fasting Lipid Panel!"? My appointment isn't until 1:30. I am kinda hungry (or hungary as I often mistype). I had an interesting night out last night. No major stories or anything, just a general interesting vibe. I did meet a repo-man. That was kinda cool. There is a Boom in the repo business right now. Fucker still didn't buy me a drink, though : P

Let's cut to the point, to the point no fakin' Cooking MC's like a pound of bacon.

I wrote another poem and I will put it here to rot.

Doyle

I'm a card player

Through and Through

It is my worst quality

I don't know

When to stop

I always play

To somehow win

I don't want to

My Dad told me

at a young age

Everything is a game

Play it to win

Because why not?

You always got to win

There's something wrong with that

I see it now

People will always look

And question your motives

Even if you have none

How would they ever believe you

Why should they?

Call a bluff

It makes the soul

Feel so

ALIVE!

That's done now. I think that is what I wrote. I was sitting in the backseat of a car and it was dark and I couldn't see what I was writing. Suprisingly, my handwriting looks the same as if I could of seen it.

More Vintage Writings....

Hey y'all! A short, quick one. This was written on a beautiful terrace at a bar called Alfo Due in the quaint Etruscan settlement of Perugia, Italia. It's truth still holds true this morning.

Zut Alors


I should quit smoking

I've been thinking about it for days and I have decided

I should really quit smoking

It does nothing good for my body

It does nothing good for my soul, yet....

I still smoke

That's it. Short and sweet and true. I miss Italy.

Quick note....

Yeah, I can't figure out the damn formatting.... dammit.

A Recent Future-Past Transcription...

I have decided to share more of my shizznit with the bored, blog-reading public. This one is a recent oldie... kinda like a Guns 'n' Roses song from Appetite....

Confusion

The residue has clogged my brain

The ash and remnant

Of 1000 lonely nights

Spent running from myself

Has made it hard

To think rationally

Has made me default

To a hyper-agreeable state

It's easier

Let others decide

Go with the flow

It's said only dead fish...

But I lay dormant

Waiting for some great moment

An epiphany

That will force me to choose

Force me to decide

Not let me be

So non-reactive

That's it. I hope the formatting stays. It seems to right justify. Wait, maybe if I use the block paragraph option. I'll try that. Late-ski all....

almost did it....

Hey everyone. I almost published the most vicious poem I have ever written. I wrote it this morning and, I was typing it, I could not believe what I had said. I am not usually like that. I will give you the one I wrote right after it instead. If anyone really wants, e-mail me at giamoitalia@gmail.com and I will send you a copy of a truly vicious work of art. I totally overused the word vicious in this intro...

Io

I am energy

I am light personified

I am creative force

I am life out loud

I am an enjoyer

I am a rejoinder

I am wit

I am emotion

I am hard working

I am a producer

I am a reactionary

I am a self-improver

I am an idealistic lover

I am not willing

To deny myself

Any of these things

That feels a bit better. Maybe a little self indulgent. Oh well. Sometimes everyone needs to self indulge.

Empty Afternoon.

Your coldness hurts me

It burns through my skin

It tears through my organ

It rips apart my soul

This I must deal with

This will not be easy

This is hard

My head hurts

and my thoughts are swimming